


Never Go Away Again

by WishIHadSalad



Category: Hello Dolly! - Herman
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-19
Updated: 2020-05-30
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:33:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23738401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WishIHadSalad/pseuds/WishIHadSalad
Summary: Dolly's plan was finally working.It has been a week since Ms. Gallagher-Levi became Mrs. Vandergelder. And in Dolly's opinion, it had been the most miserable week of her life. Her new "husband" could easily be confused with a monster from a lake. However, she had to hang on for only a little longer. It would be over soon.Yes, Dolly's plan was finally coming to be. And she would be able to live comfortably at last.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	1. We Do Not Belong Together

Dolly Gallagher-Levi. That was her name. Or, at least, it used to be. She had been known as Dolly Vandergelder for a week now, finally married to the one and only Horace Vandergelder.

The wedding had been very plain and simple, much to Dolly's disappointment. Horace hadn't wanted to "waste the money on such foolish and unnecessary wares. Dolly had tried to convince him otherwise, but it seemed that there were some arguments that even she couldn't win against the stubborn man. His arrogance had always gotten the best of him, and it didn't appear like that would be changing anytime soon. Although Horace had promised his wife that he had changed, that he had gotten better, Dolly knew otherwise. Watching from afar, she could see the way Horace continued to treat Barnaby and Cornelius the same as always; insults and demands. Sure, Horace had significantly raised their pay, and Cornelius was technically his "partner" rather than his clerk, but that didn't give him permission to constantly berate his only two workers.

Dolly always wondered why those boys stuck around. Sure, reliable Cornelius had been working for Horace for years, but did he really feel such an obligation towards Mr. Vandergelder? Of course, Cornelius was so happy these days Dolly figured he couldn't be bothered by anything. She was glad his match with Irene had ended well. The couple was scheduled to be married this coming weekend, and Dolly was quite excited to attend the wedding.

And then there was Barnaby. Dolly thought he as an oddball, that one. He was always following after Cornelius like a lost puppy, looking to him for guidance and approval. He was still quite young, and Dolly found it odd that he hadn't left Vandergelder's shop yet. Barnaby had seen what else was out there in the world on his "short trip" to Yonkers two weeks ago with Cornelius, and yet he showed no interest in pursuing a different path. Dolly hadn't heard any news about him and Minnie either, which was slightly alarming. Dolly had thought the two had decided to get married, but she hadn't heard any news about their wedding, which was very strange. After all, Dolly Vandergelder had never been wrong about a match!

Though, that wasn't entirely true. She had been wrong about one match in her entire life. The match she made with herself and Horace. She knew from the start that Horace was an uptight and cynical man. After all, she had to play every card she had to convince him to marry her. But that ended up being the easy part. The hardest part was convincing him to treat her as an equal.

Ephraim had always treated Dolly as an equal. She never had to wash floors, or iron clothes, or wash dishes, or anything all on her own; she and Ephraim did all of those together. He was warm and kind, and never failed to make her laugh. She adored her late husband, even now. But Horace... Horace was not like Ephraim at all. Horace was cruel and bitter, and expected the house to be spotless by the time he came home from work- whenever that would be. Dolly had tried time after time to show Horace that she deserved respect, but nothing had worked. Horace only saw her for what she was on the outside: A woman. That was what she was, and that was all the Horace could see. How any other girl managed to survive being married to him, Dolly couldn't guess.

But she was miserable. Dolly was miserable with Horace. Sure, she was able to finally get the lavish and luxurious lifestyle she so desperately craved, but Dolly was beginning to wonder if it had all been worth it. It had been the longest week in Dolly's life, that was for sure. She had really hoped that it wouldn't come to this, but it didn't seem like there were many options left at this point. Dolly decided to carry out her original plan. 

It was late. Horace had only just returned home from the feed shop. Dolly watched him eat his dinner as she washed the dishes.  
"What are you staring at, woman?" Horace demanded gruffly.  
"Oh, nothing at all, Mr. Vandergelder. Just admiring how you eat. You know, I once had a little pet dog who ate in the exact same way." Dolly retorted. Horace let out a grumbled sigh.  
"Keep your comments to yourself, Dolly," he muttered. "I had a hard day at the shop. I'd like to just relax tonight."  
"Of course, of course. I won't bother you at all. Complete silence." said Dolly. She continued washing for a moment. "How are Cornelius and Barnaby?"  
"They're fine. Why?" Horace asked, raising an eyebrow.  
"No reason. I just was wondering how they were getting along with the girls. Seeing as I haven't seen them since the wedding." Dolly said casually, wiping down a plate.  
"What's that supposed to mean?"  
"It just means I'm interested in their lives, is all." Dolly said innocently. There was silence for a moment as Horace dabbed the corners of his mouth with a napkin.  
"Cornelius doesn't shut up about Irene," he finally grumbled. "I constantly have to remind him to focus and get back to work. He's always talking about the dinner they had last night, or the house they're looking to buy. Feh."  
"And Barnaby?"  
"One doesn't stop talking, and the other never says a word," Horace scoffed. "The boy never speaks unless he's spoken to. You'd think he lost the ability to do so."  
"Really? That's odd. He was quite talkative at the wedding." said Dolly, intrigued. Horace shrugged his shoulders and handed his dirty plate to Dolly.  
"Doesn't matter to me. As long as he's doing work, I don't really care what's going on with him." He said, giving his wife a kiss on the cheek. It took everything Dolly had to not flinch away from him.  
"I thought Mr. Tucker had become more of a friend to you." She said rather accusingly.  
"More of a friend. Doesn't mean he is one," Horace retorted through gritted teeth. "Did you clean the washroom today?"  
"Yes." Dolly scowled. Not like there was anything else she could do, being locked up inside all day. (Horace didn't like her going out on the town when he wasn't around.)  
"Good. I'm going to bed early tonight. Like I said, it was a hard day. Come up in ten minutes." Horace said.  
"I'm not tired-"  
"I said come up in ten minutes," Horace said, much more firmly this time. "Understand?"  
"Yes, Horace."  
"Thank you," He said, and began walking out of the kitchen. "Dolly? I love you. You know that, right?"  
"Yes. I love you too." Dolly said lowly. Horace gave her one of his rare half-smiles and vanished down the hall. Dolly slammed the cup she had been cleaning down on the counter, slamming her fist down alongside it. 

Love... What did he know about love? The only thing he "loved" was his money and his pride. Horace only valued her when she did chores, and you can't love a maid as your wife. This was it. Tonight was her chance to be free. Free of this treatment, and free of him. Dolly waited exactly ten minutes before following Horace's path upstairs to the bedroom. Horace had the bed that was on the right side, while Dolly had the one closest to the door. When she entered the dark room, she could see the outlined figure of Horace already in his bed. Good, this gave her an opportunity. Silent as a mouse, Dolly opened the drawer of her nightstand and pulled out what was inside of it. A colt pistol. She turned the weapon around in her hands, examining it. Even though it was dark in the room, she could see the silver body glittering in her hands. She had loaded it before her husband came home. Now there was just one thing left to do.

Dolly gripped the pistol between her hands and flicked off the safety. She slowly began stepping towards her husbands figure, her finger just inches away from the trigger. She stood right at the foot of Horace's bed, bracing herself.

"Horace. Wake up, dear." She said as loud as she could. Horace sat up, blinking in the darkness.  
"Dolly...?" He asked, clearly dazed. "What are you-"  
"Say hello to Ephraim for me." Dolly said, and she pulled the trigger.

BANG!

Horace's head flung back, slamming hard against the back wall. Scarlet blood began dripped down his face from the large hole that now resided in the middle of his forehead. Horace Vandergelder was dead.


	2. Everyday a Little Death

Dolly sat in her kitchen, calmly sipping at the cup of tea she had made earlier. She made sure to use the high-quality leaves this morning, opposed to the usual bland ones Horace always liked. She sat there for only a minute before a knock sounded at her door. Dolly sighed a little and placed down her cup. They had come quicker than she had hoped; she at least wanted to enjoy her morning first. Dolly exited her kitchen and approached the front door, opening it only to see three uniformed policemen standing there.

"Good morning, Mrs. Vandergelder," one of the officers greeted gently, taking off his hat in respect. "We received your call and came as quickly as we could."  
"Oh thank you, sirs. Thank you so much for coming," Dolly said earnestly, inviting the officers into her house. "I just don't know what happened. It's a tragedy, a real tragedy."  
"Please calm down, Mrs. Vandergelder," another officer assured. "We're here to help. Just tell us exactly what happened."  
"Yes, yes of course." Dolly sat down, and began drinking her tea. The officers waited patiently, giving quick glances to each other. Once she had finished, Dolly looked back to them. "Well, my husband Horace got home quite late last night, at around eight. He always stays late to do paperwork, or count the sales that day-"  
"Mrs. Vandergelder."  
"Right, of course, I'm getting sidetracked," Dolly laughed slightly. "Anyway, I served Horace his dinner. And... well, I won't lie to you gentlemen, we got into a fight."  
"A fight?" One of the officers asked.  
"An argument, if you will," said Dolly. "Well, I was livid that my husband kept coming home late. I told him I wanted him home sooner, since I missed him during the day. And he told me that he couldn't control the hours when he got home, and I told him he could, seeing as he owns the business!  
"Yes, we went back and forth for quite some time. I got so upset, I'll tell you, officers. Horace was very upset as well, saying he couldn't take things anymore and that he felt absolutely miserable. It broke my heart, it really did."  
"This talk, of being miserable?" One of the officers interrupted. "Had Horace talked like that before?"  
"Only once or twice. I didn't think anything of it. He's an older man, as you probably know, so I never imagined he would ever go as far as..." Dolly trailed off.  
"We know it must be hard for you, Mrs. Vandergelder," an officer patted her shoulder. "You two have only been married for seven days, right?"  
"Seven days, thirteen hours, twenty-nine seconds. It was the shortest time, but also the most beautiful and love-filled days of my life." Dolly said dramatically. One of the officers hid a sniffle.  
"Can you lead us to where it happened?" The officer said gently. Dolly dabbed the corner of her eye with a handkerchief.  
"I suppose so. But be prepared to catch me if I faint, looking at the poor man." She stated, slowly standing up. She lead the officers up the stairs and into her bedroom. Still laying in his bed was the body of Horace, completely motionless. His entire face was covered in dry blood, the hole in his head so dark it was almost black. The once white linen sheets were also stained a sickening red. In Horace's right hand was the colt pistol.

"There he is, officers," Dolly swallowed hard and turned her face from the scene. "My beloved husband. My whole world. Dead by his own hand. I can't believe it." Two of the officers began examining Horace's body, while the remaining stayed with Dolly.  
"You say you found him this morning?" He asked.  
"Well, after our fight, I stormed out of the house," Dolly answered. "Didn't know where to go, so I just wandered. I got home very late, about ten-thirty. I was still so mad at Horace, I'll tell you. I was so mad that I slept on the couch last night. I didn't even want to be in the same room as him."  
"So he must've done it before you came home..." the officer said, writing down her words.  
"Otherwise I would've heard him, yes. Oh, how I wish I heard him. Then maybe there was still a chance I could've saved him... Oh, Horace..." Dolly wept.  
"That's alright, Ms. Vandergelder. Let it all out," the officer comforted. "I really don't believe it. I mean, I can't believe someone like the great Horace Vandergelder would commit such an atrocious act..."  
"Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought he'd be desperate enough." Dolly added. She watched as the officers carefully examined her husband's corpse, then the gun, then the wound. 

"Ms. Vandgergelder, I think maybe you should leave the house for the day," one of the officers informed her. "We're going to have to clean up here. I don't think you should watch."  
"Of course, officer. Horace and I had planned to go to lunch with some friends, but... Well, I suppose that won't be happening now." Dolly said pitifully.  
"Don't worry, Dolly. I'm sure Horace is watching over you now." Another officer said with a smile.  
"Yes, watching over me... Alongside my dear Ephraim, I'm sure," Dolly said, biting her tongue. "Well... I'll leave you boys to your work. Help yourself to the tea downstairs. It'll be cold by the time I return, so drink up."

Dolly spun around and left the bedroom, grabbing her hat along the way as she made her way out of her house. They didn't suspect a thing... Then again, why would they? Dolly Gallagher-Levi-Vandergelder was a lot of things, but a killer couldn't be one of them. She was in the clear. She was free of Horace's grip on her life. And with him dead, his entire fortune would go to his grieving widow. Of course, that was so much money for just one person. Perhaps Dolly would share the inheritance with Ermengarde...

Ermengarde. It was all too lucky that Horace's niece was currently in Long Island with her now husband, Ambrose. The two had gotten married only two days ago, and were supposed to return home in three. Dolly wondered how she'd take the news of her uncle's passing. She'd cry, of course, but then again that girl cried over anything and everything. Horace had been the only thing preventing the two from marrying before Dolly intervened. The wedding was simple but beautiful; much nicer than Dolly's own. Thinking about the girl though, Dolly felt a twinge of guilt. Horace was the only family Ermengarde had left, and now he was gone as well.

"Nonsense," Dolly told herself as she walked through the city streets, making a big show of her despair as she passed by concerned faces. "She has her aunt and her husband." There was no point in worrying about Ermengarde now anyway. Because at the moment, Dolly was on her way to visit a certain hat shop that just opened up on the corner of a Manhattan street.


	3. Making Things Up Again

The white-painted door creaked open as Dolly pushed it and entered the shop. It was smaller than the one in Yonkers, but it was just as exquisite and beautiful. Hats of all shapes and colors hung scattered around the shop, some decorated with fantastic ribbons and flowers, while a few were still plain with unfinished decorations. Dolly had yet to visit Irene's new hat shop since it opened, but she figured now was as good a time as any.

"Hello, miss? Do you need any- Oh my goodness, Mrs. Vandergelder!" A familiar voice called from afar. Dolly smiled to herself and turned to face Minnie Fay, looking simply beautiful in a pink-lace dress. Minnie dropped the broom she was holding in shock and rushed up to Dolly. "Mrs. Vandergelder, it's so wonderful to see you again! It feels like it's been eons since we last talked!" The girl said brightly. Dolly's smile got bigger; she had always been captivated by Minnie's charm.  
"And same to you, Minnie. I hope you're well?" Dolly asked as Minnie pulled out a chair for her to sit on.  
"Oh yes, Mrs. Vandergelder, so very well," Minnie babbled on. "I will admit, I much rather prefer the city from Yonkers. I love our old shop, don't misunderstand me, but something about the city is just so captivating."  
"Indeed it is. Why do you think I live here?" Dolly asked with a slight chuckle. "And how is Barnaby?" Minnie's smile fell ever so slightly.  
"Barnaby? He's... he's perfect, Mrs. Vandergelder. He's a wonderful man, just wonderful." She responded sheepishly. Dolly crossed her ankles in her chair.  
"And I don't suppose there's any word of a wedding anytime soon?" Minnie's face began to grow pale.  
"Oh no, Mrs. Vandergelder. We will... eventually, but I don't think I'm ready for marriage just yet. I'm not yet eighteen years old, I just don't see the rush..." She said, clearly embarrassed by her own words.  
"Not to worry, Minnie. You don't need to explain yourself to me," said Dolly, glancing past the girl's shoulder. "I'm just in charge of the matching. I have no business in what comes after that."  
"Thank you, Dolly."  
"Now, as much as I hate to cut our conversation short, do you know where Ms. Molloy is? I have something important to discuss with her." Dolly said as she slowly stood up. Minnie seemed to hold her breath as her eyes darted towards the back room.  
"She... is here, yes..." Minnie said carefully as if she was planning out each individual word. "I must warn you, it seems Ms. Molloy has recently come down with something."  
"Oh dear, really?"  
"Yes. She hardly ever gets sick, but I suppose this is just one of those blue moon moments," Minnie said, biting her lip. "It's a very little illness, I assure you. I don't believe she's contagious, otherwise I would be feeling unwell myself. I just thought you should know beforehand."  
"It doesn't bother me at all. I have a very strong immune system, you know." Dolly said. Minnie nodded her head and then vanished into the back room. She was gone for several minutes, to which Dolly spent occupying herself by examining the different hats that her associates were crafting and selling. They truly were beautiful hats... Perhaps Dolly would purchase one. Her own hat was starting to gain a hole in it, anyway.

As Dolly was examining the rainbow of flowers and decorative ribbons laying on a table, her attention was caught as a woman exited from the back room. Irene Molloy, dressed in a lovely blue silken dress. She looked as beautiful as ever, her long hair tied back in a long braid. She wasn't wearing a hat today, but was just as stunning without one. Although, as she approached Dolly, it was obvious that she was indeed not feeling well. Her exhaustion was indicated by bags under her eyes, and her movements were shaky and hesitant. Nevertheless, her eyes lit up as she spotted Ms. Vandergelder.

"Oh, Dolly! It's been far too long since we last talked." Irene said, taking Dolly's hands into her own. Dolly nodded kindly at the younger woman.  
"I fully agree, Irene, it's been far too long." The two women sat down as Minnie swept the floor from a distance, not bothering to hide the fact that she was listening to their conversation.  
"So, I hear you've been unwell?" Dolly asked. Irene nodded and smoothed out her dress.  
"Yes. Seems I've come down with some kind of bug. All I want to do is go home and sleep." Irene laughed.  
"Then why don't you?"  
"Oh, I couldn't possibly leave the hat shop," Irene said. "I'd trust Minnie with my life, but I'm afraid running a shop alone is simply too much to ask someone. And I couldn't bring myself to distance myself from my hats for too long, you know how it is."  
"Yes, of course." said Dolly. She couldn't help but notice that Irene seemed troubled. The woman kept glancing away from Dolly, avoiding eye contact. "So how are things with Cornelius?"  
"Simply amazing," Irene said quickly. "He is such a wonderful man. So charming and humble. He loves me so much, Dolly. And I love him."  
"That's very nice, I'm happy you two get along so well." Dolly said. Not like she needed to ask; she knew those two would be perfect for each other the second they locked eyes.  
"And how is Horace? Cornelius just loves to rant and rave about how Mr. Vandergelder is working him to the bone." Irene giggled. Dolly sighed, and straightened up.  
"Irene... I didn't want have to tell you this so soon... Why, it only just happened, I'm in such a state of shock myself..."  
"Did something happen, Dolly?" Irene asked with concern. Dolly took a deep breath and paused.  
"Horace is dead."  
"What?!" Irene and Minnie both shouted at the same time. Dolly dabbed the corner of her eye with her handkerchief again.  
"It's true. And I'm absolutely heartbroken," she said. "I tried coming here to forget about my troubles, but it would seem I can't run away from them for too long."  
"My goodness, Dolly, that's horrible. And you two have only been married for a week!" Irene gasped. "I'm so sorry. How did it happen?"  
"Suicide." Irene and Minnie both let out gasps of horror.  
"You must be joking!" Minnie squeaked out.  
"I can't believe it. Horace? Suicide?" Irene covered her mouth.  
"I know. I can't believe it either," Dolly sniffed. "He was such a proud and charming man. I would have never suspected. I suppose you can never tell, though." To her surprise, tears began streaming down Irene's cheeks. "Irene, are you alright?"  
"I'm so sorry, Dolly. That's awful, it's so awful." Irene sobbed. Minnie quickly ran to her side and handed her a handkerchief. "He was an older man, but he had so much more life left to live. I just can't believe it... Oh, Horace..."  
"Perhaps he wanted to be with his first wife more than his second." Dolly said quietly.  
"Don't say that, Dolly!" Irene cried through her sobs. "Horace loved you, I know he did. You loved Ephraim, right? Would you consider ever doing something... something like that?"  
"Of course not."  
"Then that settles it!" Irene was practically shouting now. "Mr. Vandergelder clearly had troubles we couldn't possibly begin to know. How he could be so selfish to leave his wife alone, I will never understand. But it has nothing to do with you, Dolly!" Dolly was rather taken aback by Irene's behavior. She was always such a calm and collected woman, and now she was yelling while in full tears. How peculiar.  
"Thank you, Irene. I really was starting to blame myself for it." Dolly sighed. Irene wiped her tears then took a deep breath.  
"I should head over to the feed store. Cornelius is probably wondering where Mr. Vandergelder is. He needs to know." her voice quivered.  
"Please don't. You're sick, Irene, you shouldn't be going out and about when you're unwell." Dolly said. Irene and Minnie shared a look.  
"Right, yes of course. With your news about Horace, I almost forgot about my own blights." Irene said with a half chuckle.  
"Horace's untimely passing is my own burden to carry. I will inform Barnaby and Cornelius about what happened. You just stay here and worry about yourself." Dolly said, standing up from her chair.  
"Are you sure, Ms. Vandergelder? I wouldn't mind accompanying you for the time being." Minnie suggested gently.  
"Thank you, Minnie, but I'd prefer you stay here. Horace's passing is a tragedy, yes, but I'm sure he wouldn't want you to lose business because of it. Please, stay here. For his sake." Dolly pleaded.  
"Of course we will, Dolly." Irene said, taking Dolly's hands again.  
"Thank you. I'll be back once I have better news to tell you," Dolly said to the two girls. "Perhaps we can all go out tonight. To celebrate Horace's memory?"  
"That's a wonderful idea, Dolly." Irene smiled through her watery eyes.  
"I'll see you later, then," said Dolly. "I'll be alright. Really. I've survived this before, and I'll survive it again. Farewell." 

Dolly exited the hat shop without looking back. She took a small breath to herself before carrying on. It was hard having to tell Irene about Horace's "suicide," but it seemed like Irene and Minnie hadn't suspected her of anything. In all honesty, Irene seemed a bit too convinced. Perhaps that illness was affecting her more than she led on. Either way, Dolly turned the corner away from the hat shop and headed down a familiar street until she was standing outside a large building that read "Vandergelder's Hay and Feed." The sign in the door read open.

Bracing herself, Dolly pushed open the door and walked inside.


	4. Words Fail

"Dolly! What a pleasant surprise, it's so nice to see you again!" Cornelius Hackl greeted the older woman almost the second she entered the shop. Dolly smiled kindly and let her eyes wander. She had only ever been in Horace's shop one other time. He proposed to her here, didn't he? Although Dolly felt no sympathy for the dead man, she felt an odd sense of nostalgia as she looked around the wares upon the shelves. It made her chest feel heavy.

"Dolly?" Cornelius asked again.  
"Oh, apologies Mr. Hackl, I'm just getting a sad feeling looking around." Dolly responded, taking a deep breath and straightening her position. Now now, Dolly, now isn't the time to be getting sentimental... She had a job to do, didn't she?

"Please, come in. Barnaby's in the cellar. Somehow we managed to miss some tomato cans, and well... it's awful down there, just awful." Cornelius laughed. He seemed very giddy today, although that wasn't very unusual. Cornelius was very chipper these days.  
"I can imagine. You're really stepping up to your new co-ownership, Cornelius." Dolly said lightly, finding herself still gazing around the store.  
"Oh yes. I've never been happier," Cornelius said, starting to place bags of hay onto a table. "I'm making more money than ever before, I'm getting married this weekend, and I'm going to-" He stopped himself.  
"Pardon?"  
"Ah, apologies, got distracted for a moment there," Cornelius chuckled. "I was saying I'm going to take Irene and I on a beautiful honeymoon in Yonkers. I figured since I can afford to take her there now, why not?" He was practically beaming at this point. Dolly couldn't help but feel very proud of herself for such a successful match. "Oh, Dolly? Have you seen Mr. Vandergelder today? He hasn't come in yet. Which is strange, because he's never missed a day of work in all the years I've been here." The question made Dolly pause.   
"Cornelius, I suggest you get Barnaby out here. There's something very important I need to tell you both." She said softly. Cornelius' bright and chipper smile faded.  
"Is something the matter?"  
"Please just go get Mr. Tucker." Dolly said. Cornelius nodded sharply before opening the latch to the cellar and jumping in. Dolly found herself entering the back room, admiring Horace's work office. It was so neat and orderly, just like how he liked everything in his life. Dolly looked through the papers on his desk, before something caught her eye. It was a letter written by Horace to a name she didn't recognize, a Mr. Harold Oswald.

"Dear Harold,  
It's been far too long since we last spoke. I know we left each other not on the best of terms, but I'm willing to set aside my pride and humbly ask you to come by the shop sometime this week. I've gotten married again, Harold, to a one Dolly Levi. She's a fine woman, of course. Knows how to cook and clean, no trouble there. She's stubborn as an ox, though, which is somewhat troubling. She's well-known around her as a "matchmaker," of sorts. I hope she puts a stop to all that nonsense soon. I don't like her putting her nose where it doesn't belong. Though, I must admit, that's how we ended up together in the first place. Nonetheless, I want you to meet her, Harold. She truly is a lovely woman, and I think you'd approve of her. Write back soon.  
Sincerely, Horace Vandergelder"

Dolly read the letter several times, staring at the cursive handwriting of her now deceased husband. Whoever this Harold Oswald was, Horace clearly had a history with him. Enough to ask him to come by and approve of his marriage to her... Biting her tongue, Dolly ripped the letter into shreds and dumped the bits into the nearby waste basket.

"Mrs. Vandergelder? Are you back there?" Cornelius' voice spoke from outside the office. Dolly left the room without looking back, and came face-to-face with Cornelius and Barnaby. If Cornelius looked like the happiest man on Earth, Barnaby looked the complete opposite. Barnaby had always been a bit of a shy fellow, but seeing him now, he almost looked tired. Of course, anyone would look miserable compared to Mr. Hackl.

"Hello, Mr. Tucker. It's wonderful to see you again." Dolly greeted the young man.  
"Likewise, Mrs. Vandergelder. It's always a nice surprise when you arrive." Barnaby said, giving her the small smile she had been hoping to see.  
"Now then, you said you have something to tell us?" Cornelius asked. Dolly took a long, dramatic breath.  
"Gentlemen, I have unfortunate news for you both. I suggest you sit down, as this is a lot to take in," Dolly started, taking out her handkerchief to be ready. "You see, this morning, I made the most horrendous discovery. Simply awful."  
"What is it, Dolly?" Both men asked with concern at the same time. Dolly drew out her silence for just a little longer, before striking.  
"Mr. Vandergelder is dead. Shot himself in the head sometime last night."

The eerie silence that followed her words was dreadful. Both men stared at her dumbfounded, as if they hadn't heard her properly.

"Dead? As in, not living?" Cornelius finally spoke. "Mr. Vandergelder? Dead?"  
"I'm afraid so. I couldn't see it coming from a mile away, I know." Dolly sniffed.  
"And by his own hand...?" Barnaby nearly whispered, staring down at his shoes. "I can't believe it. I just can't believe it."  
"He seemed just fine yesterday," Cornelius swallowed. "He was as normal as ever."  
"The police said that sometimes people hide how they truly feel," Dolly said quickly. "I saw him at home. He was a different man there... But even then, I never suspected... If I had noticed in time, then maybe he'd still be with us..."  
"You mustn't blame yourself, Dolly," Barnaby comforted. "Mr. Vandergelder wasn't an open person. I don't think any of us saw it coming."  
"No. None of us did." Cornelius said in an odd voice.  
"Thank you, Mr. Tucker. I'm so happy I have such wonderful people helping me through this... difficult time." Dolly sobbed.   
"What does this mean for the shop, Cornelius?" Barnaby asked with worry. "Are we going to shut down?"  
"No, of course not," Dolly interrupted. "Mr. Hackl is the co-owner, isn't he? Full ownership simply will be passed down to you. This shop will not close, I simply won't allow it."  
"Thank you, Dolly." Barnaby said relieved.  
"Yes. Thank you, Dolly." Cornelius said, looking at Dolly in a very strange way.   
"The police are still investigating the incident," said Dolly. "I'm afraid I don't have much information for you boys. I already spoke to Irene and Minnie. They suggested we all go out tonight to celebrate Horace's life. Would you care to join us?"  
"It would be our pleasure." Barnaby said kindly. Cornelius simply nodded. "We'll meet outside the hat shop at seven. Does that work for you?"  
"Surely. You two were always such dedicated workers... Horace always thought so highly of you. He truly did. He always talked about how wonderful you two were when we were alone," Dolly said as she gathered her handbag. "I know he'd be proud to see you two taking over the business. Nothing would make him happier."  
"I'm glad to do it," said Cornelius. "I've worked here my entire life. I can't imagine just giving it up. I just wish Mr. Vandergelder was still here."  
"I do too, Mr. Hackl. I do too." said Dolly.


	5. The Story of Tonight

Dolly placed down her silverware and napkin, feeling quite content. Her house was empty; the police were gone, as was Horace's body. After her afternoon with the ladies and gents, Dolly had returned home only to be told that she now had to plan the funeral, as well as preparing Horace's body. Dolly was quite displeased at this arrangement, but felt it wasn't her place to argue. She had spent the rest of the evening washing and dressing Horace's body, along with calling the funeral home to arrange a sermon tomorrow morning. It was a very strange experience for Dolly, having to hold Horace's cold, unmoving body like that. She had tried to avoid looking at the bullet hole in his forehead. Nevertheless, by the time she was finished, Horace looked younger than he had in over twenty years. Dolly didn't have much time to admire the work she did, however, before Horace was taken to the funeral home.

Dolly had first been opposed to having Horace sit in a dark room alone, but as the time passed she had felt more at ease. The silence of her home had never been so blissful. She had made herself a small evening snack, and this had been the first time since the wedding that she was was able to eat without wait (Horace always made her serve him first). Such a big home to have by herself... Maybe she'd invite Ambrose and Ermengarde to live with her. She had grown rather fond of Ambrose since his plights to wed Ermengarde; those two she would be completely fine with seeing everyday.

Glancing at the clock on the wall, Dolly realized it was almost time to meet everyone down town. Rather victoriously, Dolly left her plate on the table as she grabbed her hat and handbag and departed out the door. She'd clean her dishes when she got home, of course, but it felt wonderful to not be forced into doing it. Dolly was humming merrily to herself as she walked down the familiar streets, not even needing the lights pulsing from nearby buildings to show her the way; she knew it by heart. As she turned down the street that the hat shop was on, she caught herself suddenly and ceased her humming. 

Irene, Minnie, Cornelius, and Barnaby were all already waiting outside, whispering among themselves. As soon as Dolly was spotted, all of them turned their attentions towards her.

"Dolly, you look lovely." Irene said.  
"Thank you, Irene. Though I don't believe I look much different from how I was earlier." Dolly joked.  
"Hm? Oh yes of course," Irene laughed. "Apologies, my head hasn't been right since you told us this morning. I've been thinking about poor Horace all day..." She trailed off. Though Dolly couldn't get a full view of her face in the darkness, she heard Irene sniff.  
"Irene, please, you mustn't fuss," Cornelius was quick to comfort her. "Being hysterical isn't good... for the sickness." Cornelius sputtered the last bit of his sentence as if he had thought of it on the fly. "Um, I've read before that stress only worsens a person's health condition."  
"Yes, I also read that," Minnie added in very quickly. "Ms. Molloy, if you want to get well soon, you mustn't be so emotional."  
"Ah. Yes, of course. Thank you." Irene said, quickly wiping her eyes. Dolly said nothing, but glancing to her left she was relieved to see that Barnaby looked just as puzzled as she felt.  
"Now then. Let's be off," Cornelius interrupted her thoughts. "I've made reservations at the Galleria Bellissima on 22nd street."  
"The Galleria? My, Mr. Hackl, that's quite a treat you're giving us." Dolly commented.  
"I thought it was the best place to honor Mr. Vandergelder," Cornelius said sheepishly. "He mentioned several times about how much he loved going there in his youth. It was even where he met Rosalie-" Cornelius almost instantly shut his mouth. Dolly raised an eyebrow, but said nothing. Horace had met his first wife at this restaurant, did he? How interesting.  
"You made a good call, Cornelius. As you said, then, let's be off." Dolly said boisterously, already starting the trek to 22nd street. Her companions followed quickly after her.

The walk to the Galleria was rather grim. Hardly anyone said a word, apart from the occasional cough from Irene, or Barnaby pointing out the mundane to Cornelius. Dolly felt like she should've been the one to start conversation, but she couldn't find anything to say. At least the walk was relatively short. After only about six minutes, the bright lights of the Galleria Bellissima flooded the dark streets. Dolly had always liked that restaurant; they were very serious about having good service. Of course, she preferred Harmonia Gardens in Yonkers, but that didn't mean she couldn't enjoy the one here. Dolly turned to face the four behind her. Irene was keeping her head down looking very ill indeed, Minnie was staring directly at the lights and squinting, Cornelius was looking through his wallet and counting silently, and Barnaby was fidgeting with his fingers.

"Well then, onward we go, yes?" Dolly said a bit louder than she normally would have. Everyone quickly snapped back to reality.  
"Yes. Onward we go!" Irene said, moving and placing her own arm into Cornelius'. They smiled warmly at each other.  
"Onward we go!" Cornelius repeated, taking large steps forward as Irene kept her arm tightly locked in his. Dolly looked expectantly towards Minnie and Barnaby, but saw the two were already following after their mentors, hurrying out of Dolly's sight. Shrugging ever so slightly, Dolly also followed and entered the warm building. Just as it was on the outside, the inside of the restaurant was brightly lit, so much so that Dolly felt her eyes strain a bit as they adjusted from the darkness of the outside.

"Table for five, please. Under Cornelius Hackl." Cornelius said proudly to the maitre de. He puffed out his chest and raised his chin, something Dolly couldn't help but notice Horace did when he was trying to look important. The maitre de flipped through a book, before nodding.  
"Yes, right this way, Mr. Hackl. Your table is all set and ready." He said, leading all five of them through the rows of white-clothed tables. The restaurant was filled with smartly dressed aristocrats, sipping wine and dining on breads and meats and cheeses. The maitre de led them towards the back and to a large booth. "Here you are. I hope you find this most suitable?" He asked.  
"It's wonderful, thank you." Cornelius said as he helped Irene into the booth. As they settled in, Dolly felt very comfortable. She noticed the seats were made of leather, which she thought was a bit tacky but it looked nice nonetheless. In almost no time at all, a black-and-white clad butler came by their table, holding an olive-green menu.  
"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. And welcome to the Galleria Bellissima. May I offer you our drinks for tonight? We have a lovely Lagrange aged four years. Very refined."  
"Thank you. I'll take a Roederer, please." Dolly said, not even bothering to look at the menu. The waiter seemed surprised at her instant decision, but wrote it down nonetheless.  
"Roederer, excellent choice madame. And you, sir?" He asked, looking at Cornelius.  
"Bourbon, please. No ice." Cornelius said.  
"I'll have the same." Barnaby pipped up, staring at the first page of the drinks menu.  
"Champagne for me, please," Minnie said, giving Cornelius a sheepish smirk. "I found I quite like the taste of Champagne after Harmonia Gardens."  
"I'll just have a glass of Riesling, please," said Irene, pushing the menu back to the waiter. "I'm just getting over an illness. I just need something light."  
"Excellent choices. Your drinks will be served shortly." The waiter said, stepping away from the table. There was a long silence, in which Dolly occupied her time by eavesdropping on the different conversations that were being held around her.

"I still can't believe Mr. Vandergelder is gone," Minnie said, taking Dolly by surprise. "I mean, I just saw him the other day. He seemed perfectly normal, nothing strange in the slightest."  
"I agree," Cornelius said. "I would have never guessed. It's completely out of the blue. Completely."  
"Maybe not exactly." Dolly couldn't help herself from saying. All eyes turned to her, and she cleared her throat. "When Horace thought he was alone, he changed. He'd always sigh and mumble words I could never make out... I once even saw him crying in our room."  
"Crying?" Irene said softly.  
"That doesn't sound like him." Cornelius said firmly.  
"I completely agree. But I saw him with my own eyes. Sitting there, sobbing into his hands. Broke my heart, it did." Dolly sighed.  
"Then why didn't you say something to him? Why didn't you comfort him?" Cornelius' voice cracked. Irene touched his shoulder, and he instantly backed down.  
"I tried, but he wouldn't talk to me," Dolly voiced. "Just told me to leave him alone. So I did."  
"I just can't believe..." Cornelius voiced trailed off, and he shook his head silently. Luckily for Dolly, the waiter returned not a moment later with their drinks. Dolly took her glass all too quickly. She sipped her wine very slowly, her eyes locked on her companions. Something told her this was going to be a long night for her.


	6. I Always Knew

"And so Mr. Vandergelder told him 'We don't sell animals here, but if you're looking for a mule, then look in the mirror!" Cornelius roared, his entire face flushed red as took another sip of whiskey. Dolly watched him banter and babble, biting her tongue to avoid laughter. It was roughly nine o'clock at night, and things were finally starting to get interesting. The night had been very slow at first, no one saying a word until the waiter came by for their orders. Cornelius then surprised everyone by ordering another glass of bourbon, a hard cider, then finally a whiskey. After the cider, Cornelius had gotten very loud and boisterous, his voice bouncing off the walls of the Galleria. Dolly had to admit, she rather liked this side of Mr. Hackl.

"Cornelius, darling, you have to quiet down," Irene urged for about the tenth time already. "Please, people are staring."  
"Let them stare," slurred Cornelius. "I've never cared about people staring!"  
"Gee whiz, I really thought this was going to be a nice evening..." Minnie mumbled, poking her roast beef with her fork.  
"Nonsense, this evening is quite lovely," Dolly said, sipping some of her water. "We're all talking about and remembering Horace, aren't we? Isn't that what we came out to do?"  
"Yes... Yes, I suppose you're right." Minnie nodded, finally eating her dinner.  
"Barnaby, dear, are you alright?" Irene asked, looking at the end of the table at him. Barnaby had been sitting silently for several minutes now, so much so that Dolly had almost forgotten he was even there. Barnaby's face was incredibly red- somehow more so than Cornelius'- and he held his unfinished bourbon so tightly that his knuckles were turning white. He didn't show any indication that he heard Irene's voice.  
"Barnaby? Barnaby!" Minnie called, sounding frustrated. Finally Barnaby snapped to attention, suddenly remembering where he was.  
"Huh? What..?" He asked, blinking slowly. Even from the other side of the table, Dolly could see he was swaying in his seat.  
"Oh Barnaby, you're positively loaded!" Minnie said with astonishment.  
"But I've only had the bourbon..." Barnaby trailed off.  
"Is this the first time you've had a drink?" Dolly asked with a raised eyebrow. Barnaby nodded weakly.  
"But we ordered wine at Harmonia Gardens?" Minnie gaped. Besides her, Cornelius burst into a fit of laughter.  
"He never got to drink it, did he?" Cornelius hollered. "We were so preoccupied with everything, he didn't drink any! And he's never had alcohol before, either!"  
"Please pardon me a moment, I need to go to the water closet." Irene said suddenly, moving out of the booth and hurrying away. Dolly watched her go rather suspiciously. This was the third time tonight that Irene had 'needed to use the water closet.' Minnie, Cornelius, and Barnaby didn't seem to notice anything; Barnaby had now started crying, Minnie was trying to comfort him, and Cornelius was loudly talking to no one in particular. Sensing an opportunity to slip away, Dolly did just that.

Although she hadn't been to the Galleria in several years, she still knew the place like the back of her hand. She quickly located the restroom and walked inside. The room was completely empty without a single soul in sight. Dolly had almost thought that Irene decided to relieve herself outside when she heard a heaving sound from one of the stalls. Glancing at the stall floor, Dolly recognized the dress bottom as Irene's. Dolly immediately began to worry for her friend; Was Irene okay? She had said her illness only gave her a headache, she said nothing about nausea. Suddenly, Dolly heard a flush and Irene came waltzing out of the stall. She looked terrible, her entire face was sweating and her hair was sticking to her forehead. She looked pale. 

"Irene! Lord, are you alright?" Dolly immediately went over to the woman, holding her shoulders in case Irene decided to collapse. Irene looked at Dolly for a moment, before tears began to drip down her face.  
"Dolly, it's awful. It's just so awful." Irene wept.  
"What, your illness?"  
"Oh, Dolly! There's no illness!" Irene sobbed. "At least not in the way you're thinking. Please, Dolly, this has been such a burden to carry... Please understand that I can't tell you. I simply can't."  
"And why can't you?" Dolly asked, pushing Irene's hair out of her eyes. Irene's breath was ragged and shaky.  
"Because if I tell you, then you won't ever want to be around me again. My life will be ruined if you know!" said Irene.  
"Irene, I can assure you that nothing you could ever say will turn me away. I consider you a dear friend." Dolly said gently. Irene went silent for a moment, only letting out occasional sniffles. Dolly allowed her to cry out, keeping her eye on the door lest any unwanted visitors would come in.  
"I didn't intend for it to happen, I-I made a mistake..." Irene croaked.  
"Irene, stop apologizing and just tell me."  
"Dolly... I'm going to have a baby." Irene forced out, giving a very, very weak smile. Dolly blinked.  
"...What?"  
"I know you must be disgusted," Irene shook her head. "Knowing that Cornelius and I would be so... so foolish to be spending nights with each other before we're married. We thought it was fine, we're both adults. But now look at where it got us. I had been hoping my unwellness had been just a light passing, but I've been reading. I have all of the symptoms, every single one."  
"Irene!" Dolly couldn't help but exclaim. "Surely you must be joking? This is wonderful news!"  
"It is?" Irene said, completely shocked. "But... this child is illegitimate. It's a sin."  
"Oh, who cares about illegitimacy," Dolly scoffed. "A child conceived in marriage or out of marriage, it makes no difference. It's still just a child. And besides, you two will be married in three days. No one will ever need to know."  
"I... suppose that's true." Irene blinked, the realization of Dolly's words setting in.  
"Listen," Dolly said, trying not to laugh at the sheer shock of the situation. "This is nothing to mourn over. A family is a wonderful thing to have, especially with the person you love. I was never able to start one, even in my youth." "Dolly, I'm so sorry-" "Don't feel sorry. This isn't about me," Dolly said for the first time in her life. "This is about you and Cornelius. It's unexpected, yes. But have you ever thought about children before?" Irene looked taken aback by the question. "Surely not. Well, no, that's not entirely true..." she said slowly. "I mentioned the idea once to my Peter, so many years ago. But... he rejected the idea, saying that we wouldn't make for good parents. It was so long ago, Dolly, but I remember... I remember that broke my heart." "You know what I think?" Dolly asked. "I think you've been so preoccupied with keeping this a secret, you haven't even had a chance to think about how you really feel about your situation. Ms. Molloy, tell me how you feel."  
"H-how I feel?" repeated Irene. "Well, I feel... terrified, and lost, and miserable, but..."  
"But?"  
"But... somewhat excited," Irene breathed. "I feel excited for all the possibilities the future holds. I feel nervous, but not because of people knowing, but because I don't know if I can do this. I feel hope for the family that I never got to have... And I feel so much love for something that isn't even here yet." Dolly smiled and took Irene's hands.  
"So what do you care about what other people have to say? When have you ever cared?" Dolly could see the thought passing through Irene's mind.  
"You're right. Oh Dolly, you're right!" Irene's pep returned so quickly it almost startled Dolly. "I've been so focused on all the negatives that I haven't even considered the positives. And... there are so, so many positives. Oh Dolly, thank you. Thank you!"  
"You're very welcome," Dolly said, and the two embraced. "Do you plan to tell Cornelius before or after the wedding?"  
"Oh, Cornelius knows already. As does Minnie," said Irene. "They're the only ones, I promise. Don't give me that look, Dolly Vandergelder! I had to tell Cornelius, he's as much apart of this as I am. And I can't hide anything from Minnie. She barged right into my room as I was reading one of those books, and I had to come clean. I wanted to tell you the second I knew, but I was afraid of how you'd react."  
"As long as we're the only ones, you have absolutely nothing to worry about." said Dolly. So Barnaby was the only one who didn't know... "Now then, let's get you cleaned up and go back to everyone else. We're going to need a lot of strength to to drag Cornelius and Barnaby back home." Irene laughed, a genuine laugh that Dolly hadn't heard in quite some time, and the two women began to fix each other's appearances, talking as old friends.


	7. How Does the Wine Taste?

After Irene and Dolly had returned to the booth, it seemed the night was finally turning around. Minnie had somehow managed to get Cornelius' whiskey away from him, so he was now babbling senselessly about nothing of particular interest. Barnaby was now laying with his head down, letting out occasional groans to show that he was still alive. Minnie, Irene, and Dolly, meanwhile, all began chatting. First about the hat shop, then about Horace, then about Ermengarde and Ambrose, then about Horace. After their "talk," Dolly noticed that Irene had perked up significantly. She was finally acting like her old self again, laughing and chattering to her heart's content. Why, Dolly could even say she was positively glowing. 

"Shall we order desert, ladies?" Cornelius hiccuped once the waiter cleared their plates.  
"Oh dear, no," Irene laughed. "I'm simply stuffed to the brim. I couldn't possibly eat anything else."  
"Me too," Minnie chimed in. "I shouldn't have drank all that champagne..."  
"Nonsense!" Cornelius boomed, taking all three ladies by surprise. "Only the best for my good friends! Waiter, bring us a Charlotte Russe!"  
"Now now, Cornelius," Dolly tutted as Irene and Minnie attempted to quiet him down. "Don't wave your money around. Don't you remember where that got you the last time?" Cornelius looked at Dolly with a expression that wouldn't look out of place on a confused dog. Suddenly, her words seemed to have reached him.  
"Ah, yes... You're right, Ms. Vandergelder. My apologies, ladies," Cornelius said, embarrassed. Irene smiled and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"You're sweet for wanting to cater to us. But I think it's time we all head home, don't you?" She asked gently. Cornelius' eyelids batted at a rapid pace as if he were struggling to keep them open.  
"Yes... you're right, Irene. Waiter, check please!" Cornelius called to the nearest server. Dolly savored the last drops of her wine, eyeing the two as she did so. Irene had been simply mortified that the two of them had been having premarital intercourse, but Dolly almost couldn't understand why. They loved each other, that was obvious. So why was it such a sinful thing to show your affections towards a partner, whether you were married or not? Dolly just couldn't wrap her head around it.

Before long, Cornelius paid the check in full- while also leaving a very generous tip as a way to make up for his "disturbances"- and the small party was out the door. Cornelius seemed to be doing better now, or at least he was walking besides Irene without stumbling too much. Barnaby, on the other hand, was basically being carried by Minnie. Dolly couldn't help but find it amusing, watching the young girl teaching Barnaby to walk like he was a young child. Barnaby kept gagging, sounding like he was about to vomit on the streets. Minnie scolded him quite a bit, calling him a colorful amount of names for letting himself get into this state. Dolly was quite entertained on the walk back to the hat shop.

"I'll call a hack for the girls," Cornelius stated once they arrived. "I'll just take Barnaby home myself. I don't think he's in much of a condition to ride in anything."  
"Oh, but Mr. Hackl, wouldn't you say it's more elegant if we walked home?" Irene asked with a raised eyebrow.  
"You're funny. But I'd feel more comfortable if I called a hack. Lots of danger in the city at night." said Cornelius.  
"Ah, I can imagine. Like men in wardrobes?" Irene asked, trying not to smile.  
"Or getting arrested?" Minnie asked.  
"Alright, I get it," Cornelius interrupted. "You've made your point. Let me call the hack."

It only took about five minutes for Cornelius to wave over a driver. Irene and Minnie both slid into the automobile, looking expectantly towards Dolly.

"Oh no, I'll walk please," Dolly insisted. "I always love walking through the streets at night. Helps clear the head, you know." With that, Cornelius shut the door to the hack and it sped off, disappearing into the night. Cornelius watched it go anxiously, meanwhile Barnaby slunk over to an alleyway and proceeded to retch out his dinner.  
"Mr Hackl, thank you for the lovely night," Dolly said to him. "It was wonderful, being with everyone again. Makes me remember all that Horace did for us."  
"Of course, Dolly. Mr. Vandergelder wasn't always the nicest to us, but he was a great man. I'm going to miss him, I really am." said Cornelius solemnly.  
"Yes, it's simply heartbreaking... Well, I suppose I must get home now. Take care, Cornelius. Oh, and congratulations on the new addition to your family." Dolly said in a low voice so that Barnaby, or any of the other passersby could hear. Even through the dimly lit darkness, Dolly saw Cornelius' eyes widen.  
"How do you know about that?" he asked, shocked. Dolly chuckled.  
"Irene told me while you were a bit... preoccupied. Not to worry, my lips are sealed. How are you feeling?" She asked curiously. Cornelius glanced to his side to make sure Barnaby was still distracted before whispering.  
"Honestly? I'm thrilled," Cornelius said, grinning giddily. "I love Irene so much. I'm honored to start a family with her. Though... she's been miserable for the past few days. Irene's status means a lot to her, and she's so worried that people will find out that we... you know, before marriage. You know how some people think about that kind of thing. She's been so stressed, I don't think she's even had time to really feel anything else."  
"Yes, she told me that exact same story," Dolly spoke. "Not to worry, though. I talked with her, and I think she's feeling much better now."  
"What did you say?"  
"Nothing much. Just some advice from an old woman. Take care, Mr. Hackl." Dolly said with a wink before starting on her walk home. 

It really was a lovely night. The inky sky was dotted with clear white stars. There weren't that many people out on the streets at the moment, but the few that were greeted Dolly kindly. It was pleasantly warm, too; not too hot, and not too chill. It was night's like this that reminded Dolly of why she needed to keep living. For her own sake, and Ephraim's. Ephraim... what would he think of his dear wife now? Matchmaker, gossiper, murderer... Dolly didn't want to think too much about it.

Finally, after her pleasant walk, Dolly returned to her home. The dish was still on the table where she left it. She hung up her hat and headed upstairs to change into her nightwear. She she readied for a nice, well-deserved slumber, she took notice of her bedroom. Those police men had done a wonderful job of cleaning everything up; by looking at it, you could never have told that a man died here. Nevertheless, Horace's bed was empty. Getting an idea, Dolly moved to Horace's bed and began pushing it to the right. She then pushed her own bed to the left, the two separate beds meeting in the middle to create one giant combination. Dolly slid under the covers, enjoying the spaciousness of her design. Filled with delicious wines and foods, Dolly closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep.


	8. Dyin' Ain't So Bad

Dolly gazed into her mirror, trying to fit all of her hair into a tight bun. It was the next morning now, and Dolly Vandergelder was clad in all black. For today was Horace's funeral.

Dolly had at first tried to plan for the funeral to be several days from now, but quickly realized that rather than holding it off, it would be best to simply get it over with and then move on. The funeral home had called everyone of importance to Horace, so at least that was one less thing for Dolly to have to do. It was approaching noon now, and she would have to leave soon. Just act sad and this will all be behind you, Dolly thought as she wrapped a shawl around her shoulders. After today, your life will begin for real.

A sudden buzzing alerted Dolly, distracting her from the task at hand. The doorbell? Now, who could be ringing right now? Perhaps Cornelius or Barnaby? Nevertheless, Dolly opened up the front door and was quite shocked to see who was there.

"Dolly!" Ambrose Kemper, dressed in a classy tan suit stood before her. In his arms was a large stack of suitcases, all identical in a hideous olive green. Standing besides Ambrose was Ermengarde, her entire face welled up and red from crying. 

"Why, Ermengarde, Ambrose!" Dolly exclaimed, failing to hide the shock in her voice. "You two are back early. I could've sworn you said you'd be back in two more days?"  
"That was the plan, Ms. Vandergelder," Ambrose said sheepishly as Ermengarde began to sniff. "But after we heard of... of the news, we rushed home as soon as we could."  
"Ah, yes, of course. I'm surprised they managed to reach you all the way from Long Island." Dolly said casually.  
"I am, too," said Ambrose. "After all, we-"  
"It was simply awful!" Ermengarde exploded, her voice as wet as her eyes. "Out for a walk, and we get a call that poor Uncle is dead! It's-it's...!" Ermengarde was unable to finish her sentence, sobbing into her hands. Ambrose was quick to comfort her, looking at Dolly with slight embarrassment.  
"May we come in, Dolly?" He asked.  
"But of course." Dolly stated, leading the couple inside. Dolly sat them at the table, Ermengarde continuing to cry quietly while Ambrose looked very distressed.

"So, until the end, how was your stay in Long Island?" Dolly asked, putting a tea kettle on the stove.  
"It was wonderful, absolutely stunning place," Ambrose began. "I've never-"  
"The beaches were too hot," Ermengarde sniffled. "I got sunburn on my back."  
"That's because you spent all day in the sun without any shade," Ambrose bit his lip. "Anyway, it was wonderful there. Plenty to see and do. I think I may go back there some day!"  
"I'm glad you enjoyed yourself," Dolly said with a smile. "I'm sorry your time had to be cut short."  
"Don't worry. It's not like it was your fault." Ambrose said, straightening his tie. Dolly froze for a moment, before returning to the tea kettle.  
"Poor Uncle. How he go and do something like that?" Ermengarde wailed.  
"It's impossible to know, Ermy," Ambrose said, taking her hand. "Sometimes people are just... unhappy."  
"But that's no reason to shoot yourself for!" She cried. Ambrose sighed in defeat.  
"Well, it's good you two came back so soon. The funeral's today, you know," Dolly said, pouring three cups of tea once steam starting emitting from the kettle.  
"We know. We actually ran to the train station so we wouldn't be late!" said Ambrose, taking a tea cup from Dolly. "It was very stressful."  
"Very stressful." Ermengarde repeated, sniffing into her cup.  
"I'm sorry to hear that. A young couple should never have to be thrown into a situation like that," Dolly stated.  
"Well, death is a thing that happens all the time, unfortunately," Ambrose sighed, sipping from his tea. "We just have to figure out how to handle it."  
"Easier said than done." Ermengarde folded her arms and pouted her lip.  
"Maybe. It felt like I would never recover after my mother died, but eventually I was able to move on," Ambrose said wisely. "I know it's hard losing your uncle, Ermy, but it'll all be okay."  
"He has a point, Ermengarde," Dolly chimed in. "Horace was a good man-"  
"I wouldn't say 'good.'" Ermengarde muttered under her breath.  
"Well, he was a decent man, to say the least," Dolly thought of her words carefully. "And for him to die before his proper time, well it's simply terrible. But life will go on. And it's up to us to make sure it does. And look on the bright side, Ermengarde. You have the two of us besides you."  
"But-"  
"I know what you're thinking, but I can assure you that I am going nowhere anytime soon," Dolly said boastfully, placing down her tea cup without drinking from it. "From a tragedy comes opportunity, I always say. Yes, Horace's passing is such a shame, but there is so much more to life than grievances, wouldn't you agree?"  
"I don't know..." Ermengarde mumbled. "It's been sixteen years, but I still miss my parents."  
"It's okay to miss them," Ambrose said carefully. "But it's important to not let your life be run by their deaths. Right, Dolly?" He said, looking at her side-eyed.  
"I agree completely. We will mourn for Horace, but we will not let it get us down! He wouldn't have wanted that." said Dolly.  
"I suppose that's right..." Ermengarde said slowly, wiping her eyes of any remaining tears.  
"Wonderful. Now then, I have to finish getting ready. You two look beautiful already, so no problem there," Dolly said, drinking all of her tea. "Will you two do me the honor of accompanying me to the funeral home?"  
"Of course, Dolly." Ambrose said before Ermengarde could even open her mouth.  
"Wonderful. I'll be back in five minutes." Dolly said with a wink, disappearing from the kitchen and venturing upstairs. 

She wasn't expecting this... Ermengarde and Ambrose were supposed to return home after the funeral, not before... Well, Dolly thought as she gazed at the two pushed-together beds in her room, she had always been quick to think on her feet. With Horace's fragile niece back, Dolly was going to have to make sure she kept her story consistent. If Ermengarde ended up blabbering about an inconsistency to Dolly's story, that would mean lights out for everything she had worked so hard to accomplish.


	9. Memory

Dolly kept her head down for most of the service. 

She knew it was rather rude and disrespectful to not talk to those attending the funeral, but she simply couldn't bare to face anyone at the present moment. The funeral song playing a low, drab beat, Dolly's close companions crying silently to themselves (apart from Ermengarde, who's wailing could be heard from across the room), and Horace's lifeless body resting peacefully for all to see, it was all starting to be too much. Dolly felt sick to her stomach, and was finding it hard to breathe at certain points. She was beginning to flashback to Ephraim's funeral.

Oh, what an awful day that had been. It had appropriately rained for nearly the entire day. Dolly had found herself unable to say a word during the entire service, even when she was coaxed by the undertaker to say a few words on her husband's behalf. Just the sight of her beloved Ephraim laying there with his eyes closed, unmoving... It affected her in a way that she had never felt before.

Dolly Gallagher was never much of a mourner. Even at the funeral of her own parents when she was much younger, Dolly had been the one comforting others rather than vice versa. But something about losing Ephraim changed Dolly. It was like the light in her life had gone out, never to relight. 

Even now, as Dolly sat in a chair and stared down at the floor, that feeling was returning. That feeling of loss, of despair, of guilt. Dolly hadn't felt guilty at all up until this point, not even when she was plotting Horace's demise. So why now, when all of this was finally going to be put behind her, why was she feeling this way? Horace was a cruel and selfish man, and she didn't love him like she loved Ephraim.... Right?

"Dolly?" Dolly's mind snapped back to reality as Irene approached her. "Are you alright? It's unlike you to be sitting alone."  
"Ah, don't worry about me, dear," Dolly assured. "I was simply lost in thought, that's all."  
"I know you must be heartbroken, Dolly," Irene said, sitting besides her friend. "Losing one husband is bad enough, but to lose two in one lifetime? It's simply horrid. I can't possibly understand what you're going through right now, but Dolly Vandergelder, I know you'll be able to recover from this. You decided you would live on again after Ephraim, right? Well, you have to make that choice again. You have to choose to live."  
"My, when did you get so profound?" Dolly chuckled softly. Irene smiled.  
"After you helped me. I didn't realize it, but I was never the same after my Peter left me. It wasn't until I met Cornelius that I realized what I had truly been missing," Irene said, turning her gaze onto Horace's casket. "Dolly, you are stronger than anyone I know. You've recovered once, and you can do it again. And this time you have all of us here to support you."  
"Thank you, Irene. I'm glad I have someone like you in my life." Dolly said, meaning every word. Irene gave her a hug before moving across the room, where she was quickly waved over by Cornelius. Although she was never much of a religious woman, Dolly found herself saying a prayer for her deceased husband. Irene was right, she had to move on from this. If she spent the rest of her numbered days feeling guilty for the past, then she would never get to look towards the future. She wasn't going to let her parade pass by ever again.

Just as Dolly was silently celebrating her victory, something caught her eye. She noticed two figures- whom she quickly deduced as Minnie and Barnaby- exiting the room quickly and silently. Dolly felt intrigued as she wondered what those two were up to. It wasn't like either of them to simply leave a funeral without saying anything. Seeing as this was no doubt a couple's affair, and Dolly was indeed the expert on relationships, she exited the funeral home after them, trying to spot where the couple had run off to.

"Do you know how obvious you were making it? You almost got caught, Barnaby!" Minnie's shrill voice shrieked from behind the funeral home. Dolly walked around the building, stationing behind a corner. Minnie and Barnaby were both behind the home, hidden from public sight and seemingly having an argument.

"I did not 'almost get caught,' Minnie!" Barnaby retorted back. "And keep your voice down, we'll definitely get found out if you keep screaming like that."  
"I saw you, Barnaby," Minnie said, dropping her voice. "You were trying to hold his hand. That's a very suspicious thing to do!"  
"Oh, like you don't do the exact same thing with Irene?" Barnaby crossed his arms. "Following her everywhere she goes, laughing at her jokes, agreeing with her every word? You don't think that's obvious?"  
"It's... It's different for me. I'm a girl, no one would suspect anything." said Minnie, sounding rather sheepish.  
"At least I'm not constantly all over Cornelius the way you are with Ms. Molloy. Frankly, I'm surprised no one's figured out you're in love with her yet!" From behind the corner, Dolly's eyes widened.  
"Really? What about you?"  
"What about me?"  
"'Oh Cornelius, look at that bird!'" Minnie began doing a snide impression of Barnaby. "'Hey Cornelius, do you like the blue tie or the red tie? Hey Cornelius, why don't I order the exact same meal as you so we can have something in common?'"  
"Okay, I get it." Barnaby mumbled, turning his head away from her.  
"Clearly you don't!" Minnie shrieked again before taking a deep breath. "You can't get caught, Barnaby. I can't let anyone figure it out."  
"Why does it even matter to you if someone starts suspecting me?" Barnaby mumbled so quietly that Dolly almost couldn't hear him. "It'll be me who gets chased after with a pitchfork, not you."  
"Because you are literally the only person I have ever met that feels the same way that I do," said Minnie. "I've lived my entire life feeling like I was broken and wrong, like I was a busted version of someone. But when you confessed to me how you felt, I realized that I'm not alone. That maybe I'm not broken after all. Barnaby, losing you would mean losing myself. We have to be there for each other, because no one else will." Barnaby was silent for a long time, mulling over Minnie's words.

"...Okay. You're right. I'll be more careful from now on." Barnaby said.  
"And I'll do the same. I admit, I probably haven't been so subtle myself," Minnie said, twiddling her thumbs. "Let's keep looking out for each other. Okay?"  
"Okay." The two embraced, and Dolly took this as her cue to leave. She didn't even have enough time to process what she had just witnesses before accidentally kicking a tin can that had been laying on the ground. It bounced away, making a clinking sound as it did so.

"Hello? Is someone there?" Barnaby's panicked voice rang out. Dolly hesitated for a moment before turning back, coming into full view of Barnaby and Minnie.

"Good evening, Ms. Fay, Mr. Tucker," Dolly said as casually as she could. "The weather's simply wonderful today, isn't it?"


End file.
